How to Live a Joyful Life

For a long time I was stuck in a rut. Just existing. Living life but not truly living my best life. One of my mentors pointed out to me that I accomplished so much, but what is my goal? What do I want at this moment in my personal and professional life? She challenged me to figure out my “why” and connect biweekly with senior leaders, influencers, key stakeholders, and those that inspire me to create a powerful network.

The lightbulb clicked after talking with my mentor. I immediately took ownership of my life and my joy. After a long period of darkness (grief, sadness, anger, isolation, and denial), I finally found light. I became unstuck. Not solely through a clinical therapist but through traditional Chinese Medicine and Accupuncture. The accupuncture improved my mood by correcting the imbalance of energy in my body. I also found a Life Coach. My Life Coach helped me to identify my source of happiness: the little uninhibited girl inside of me. That little girl has no fear, she’s joyful, loves to have fun and travel.

Through the encouragement and support of my Life Coach I started to practice self-care and to do what brings me joy: travel and creating memorable experiences.

• I’ve traveled to the Great Wolf Lodge with my Dad, Baby Brother and Cousins and had the time of my life at the indoor heated water park! Watching the kids play and enjoy themselves brought me joy.

• I saw Anita Baker LIVE at her farewell concert with my elementary school best friend and spent time with a dear Air Force Friend. This filled me with an indescribable joy.

• I traveled to Hawaii to see my Air Force Sister retire. It was joyful witnessing her ceremony and feeling all the love from friends and family. The beach and spending time with my Military family brought me immense joy that I haven’t experienced in a long time.

• Next week I’ll be traveling to New Orleans for the Essence Music Festival to enjoy great food, Sister Fellowship, Great Drinks, and of course listen to musical icons like Janet Jackson, Jill Scott, The Roots, Escape, Mary J. Blige and Fantasia. This brings me exponential joy.

You see I was spending time “accomplishing goals” but I wasn’t living in the moment. That was my “aha moment.” My mentor helped me to realize that my toolbox of accomplishments was not my source of joy. I needed to rediscover what brought me joy. Not every treatment or method of therapy is going to help everyone the same. I’m a big advocate of traditional therapy as needed, but also incorporating naturopathic treatments and seeking mentors and life coaches. For me healing is a collaborative effort. We are all unique. I will eventually seek a grief counselor as I’ve suffered tremendous loss in a short period of time. For now my methods of treatment have worked tremendously to improve my mood and quality of life. I’m living in the moment with joy.

Love,

Simply Ebony

Story of Survival and Healing from Rape and Domestic Violence

I survived a brutal rape by a serial rapist at 15-years-old. My rapist, told the bystanders that it was a ‘domestic issue.’ I pleaded with them to help me yet they all watched me get raped. The rape was a defining moment in my life.

I enlisted in the United States Air Force (USAF) at 18-years-old. While overseas in the USAF, I eloped and married. My husband eventually became abusive. I filed for divorce from him after a year of separation.

Later in life, I found myself in another abusive relationship. I fought through the disappointment when the courts failed to hold my abusive boyfriend accountable. He continuously violated the protective order and stalked me at my place of employment and my home.

Through all of the trials that I faced, my faith never wavered. I separated from the USAF with an Honorable Discharge. I founded The Next Chapter, Corporation, a 501c3 non-profit, dedicated to empowering victims of domestic violence and sexual assault. I launched my second business, Success Creators to provide coaching for individuals and business development. Once I opened that door to healing and wellness, the doors opened for me to follow my passion and to help others.

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